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Poems by Bajram Haliti
In the night of the shining star
As Gods held their divine assemblage
Over a glass of nectar,
Drinking and singing:
”Oh, thou, beautiful painting,
Oh, thou, happiness of the sky!”
A rumor has reached them
Out of nowhere,
That the celestial chain has been broken,
The shining star has disappeared somewhere.
The golden chord broke on zither,
The song froze up,
And the gods said aloud:
”Yes, the lost star was the most beautiful one.
She was the glory of the holy sky.”
Since that time,
I, with Garuda by my side,
Seek for the star by the name of
I seek for her on the holy rivers Sindh and Ganges,
On the Vindhya Range,
In Mālwa (Avanti) province
And its capital Ujjain,
Where Kālidāsa also lived;
In the courtyard of emperor Vikramāditya
Of the famous Gupta dynasty;
On the rivers Yamuna, Ganges and Sarasvatï.
I flew over the mythic Himalayas heights,
Over the Manās River
And reached the town of Alakā
On the heights of Mount Meru,
Olympia of Bharata,
Where I prayed to Avatar
To transform me into Vishnu
Who created Rāma and Krishna;
To define my ashrama
In Rājasthān, in the city of Jaipur
The very same as
Aurobindo`s in Auroville,
Ramakrishna`s in Dakshineswar
And Radya`s in pūjā
So I could find out the Truth.
Let me tell you…
Queen Mumtaz Mahal sleeps
On the faraway golden coast
Over the seven stormy seas.
And no one on the Earth can find her.
I alone know her hiding place.
Shāh Jahān required
For true paradise garden
To be made for his wife around Āgra
On the bank of the river Chaman.
If there is a paradise on the world
Then this is the place, that’s the one,
That's the one!
On her forehead there is a red spot.
Still yet, she gives away her respect
To King Shāh Jahān.
With hands covered in gold,
And pearls around her neck,
With black hair reaching the ground,
With white sari around her sturdy body,
She is a Brahmān.
She is resurrecting.
And tonight she is talking to us
About the sadness of love.
She resurrects only
When she feels my touch.
`Cause I hold in my hands the Maya-
Feminine magic of the universe.
In this temple there is a treasure
Larger than the universe.
Do not disturb that temple:
Do not disturb the domes
Made by the artisans from Istanbul,
Lahore and Samarqand,
Built by the bricklayers from Delhi and Kandahār,
Penmanship by the calligraphers from Shiraz and Baghdad
Ornate with flowery frets by the carvers from Bukhara,
Projected by the architects from Kashmir,
Do not disturb it because it is a talisman.
Do not talk to Queen
`Cause she’s mixed with charm.
The marble of this temple
Is musk and ambrosia,
The roof and the door of this temple
Are ton and melody!
The one who have found the way to this temple
The one who has this temple as his goal,
Is the sage of his time,
Is the ruler of the whole world.
What brings the night before me?!
No, I do not wish to see
Cities, rivers and men on the Earth.
I wish to see the woman`s face
Inside the mausoleum of Arjumand Banu Bagam,
Who was renamed by Shāh Jahān
Into Mumtaz Mahal
The jewel of the palace.
The face of the woman
Who's been luring me for years
To come to Āgra,
In my marble dream.
Love makes heart to become a heart.
From loveless heart only dust and water remain.
A heart that is not burned is not really a heart;
A cold heart creates only mud in ones soul.
Oh, God, it makes the fire in my chest,
Let all be burned by my heart.
Āgra is so large.
It has its map,
Its history and
Stealthily, I'm listening for a footstep
Coming from the 17th century
Desiring to meet me.
She's awaiting me.
At the old table
Sitting on a tripod,
The woman who trusted in words
Is expecting you tonight.
Tonight, on April 15th,
On my birthday,
You spilled your probity from a glass,
How many graves do you hide
On the bottom of it?
Oh, my dearest,
Oh, my precious,
Oh, you almighty,
Have mercy and take me with you,
I am yours.
Do not leave me alone.
Oh, you, who ones enjoyed
Talking to me,
Now you remain silent before me
And leave me with no answer.
The road led me
Towards my permanent dream.
Today, by the shore,
I'm waiting for the sun
To rise, to warm me up.
One face, as the light,
Flew over the men,
Encountering in bloody embraces
On the land and sea.
On your bottom
Not only dead stars sleep.
To the contrary,
There are alive walking stars.
Strong wind opens the large door.
Before you the face drifts
Carried by the river waves,
Deaf and mute in your beliefs
You step into cold haze.
The love toward outward
Is not love but dishonor.
To love ephemeral is inconsistent
For the one who dies does not resurrect.
The love toward living never ends
In soul and in the eye it is fresh as a rosebud.
Chose the love of the woman, the endless one
That waters you with the wine of life.
Chose the love of the One
That was cherished by everyone.
In the dark night
I'm asking Garuda to take me
To queen Mumtaz Mahal
So I could put out the fire
That burns in me.
My dear Garuda, fast as the light
Turned to me and said:
Because of your broken heart,
I recognize your pain.”
Still I can not understand
Tonight I met you,
I can see
That you're still waiting for Shāh Jahān
In your white sari.
You- precious flower,
Sapphire of Asia,
Ruler of Barathan,
The most beautiful one,
The one that is loved as Yamuna is loved,
Tender in love,
Bright as the moon,
Longing of the whole Barathan,
The one that resembles a flower,
The one with a face of sorceress,
Master of all mankind,
The one that shines on the sky,
The east breeze,
The home of the Moon,
The queen of eternity-
You are the one that I was searching for.
I didn't come to steal the fruits
That you scattered over the hidden hills,
Where poplars bow to wind tribes.
I didn't come to rip out your flowers,
Which I have never seen,
So I could make a dress out of them,
Nor to hide my kindness among them.
Oh, thou, star of Bharata,
I know `tis not a dream
Nor fantasy.`Tis true.
You are like the rainbow
On the spring sky.
You are the prettiest
Among the most beautiful ones.
You are the one that I was searching for.
I do not know the reason
For my confusion
When I'm by your side.
Maybe because you are an obsession to me,
Or maybe that's just because of your beauty
That spreads like the air all over the world.
I'm silent with passion.
The one who believes not
Tonight stands beside you.
Turn off the light
In the depths of your house.
Today is April 15th
The night has fallen-
The night which is to be written about.
I do not need my eyes any more.
I do not want this night to end.
I am here by your side
In front of your door
That I open over and over again.
Oh, Lord, when I first saw her
I thought of the ways
To steal her from Shāh Jahān,
The great Hindu tsar.
Her grandiose beauty impelled me
To think of the way to steal the pitcher
With the red vintage from her hands
That I want to drink alone
Till the end of my days.
She looks at me
But her eyes do not see
Where the truth lies.
So I laugh too.
I wish for this
To be my last memory.
Oh, how grandiose is her beauty!
You arrived from a faraway town.
You are tired…
We are bound by the sacrifice,
Not by the faded past.
The centuries have turned insensitive.
Let me be
Alone, in my death.
Oh, Shāh Jahān, the king!
Why did blood have to be your passion?!
Quietude in the aisle of Taj Mahal edifice
Happens to be the dream of us all.
I do not see
Why is this obsession growing inside of me.
Who will appease the desire in me?
Your smile tells me, Mumtaz Mahal,
That you still belong to him.
No one should come here.
The great Hindu king Shāh Jahān
Is the warden of entire India.
Oh, Taj Mahal,
You- dressed in golden garment,
Ornate with myriad sapphires,
With breasts orbed as an ewer,
With pearl necklace around your neck,
Whose beauty increases the essence of Kashmir alley;
Oh, goddess! Queen of entire India!
You- who signify the complex of all beings, visible and invisible,
You- whose womb is receptacle where cosmos resides,
You- waterfall of enlightened wisdom,
You- who cherish the ruler of the world's spirit,
Disclose the player in his own game,
Present him with salvation tonight.
I swear on my love.
Will you take me for your servant?!
That would be better than
Being a ruler of entire world!
Look, the river is slowly pulsing with life,
Through someone else's dreams
Bloody gene of defiance flies.
Get the disputes out of your pretty head
Before the rage that flows in kings veins reaches us.
You’ve placed me among the losers,
Hear me well-
I shall gamble with everything I've got.
She sleeps in my dark thoughts.
Was her life just a mist to me?
No, tonight I wish
For us to be together,
Dead and lost,
Hidden from everyone.
I wish for us to be bound
And surrounded by the bursting ground.
Away from the cross-roads of the world,
Away from the light,
So we could relinquish ourselves to the world
Just like the first deceased in the world.
Retired in mutual death muffled in the dark.
Now I'm retiring with the words:
Let no one feel scarcely,
Let no one care for your tears.
Look, you are dead,
And I did not dig your grave.
And I didn't implicate the painful, dark thought
Into your dying dress.
I am not to blame for your tears,
I am not to blame for these words.
The strong wind is blowing.
I am stepping inside.
I am getting near her;
She is in the corner,
With her head bowed.
Lord, forgive me.
If only I were not so young
If only I were not unwise.
Her soul and the thought of her
Cleave into my body again.
Forgive me, my Lord, forgive me.
The night is long.
The bones are heavy.
If tears are wrong-
How can one heal?
If I could spend the night on her heart
I would jump to the sky with bliss,
I would take the pen out of Mercury’s hand,
And break his sunny crown,
I would look at the dawn from the ninth sky,
And with my leg I would break the Saturn’s ring,
For all lovers I would ask for god’s mercy,
For those persons in distress I would bring nice presents:
If her face, stature and eyes could only be mine.
Between the gates of death
Dreams have wandered.
The honesty teaches us
I'm the truth of the universe.
Pass the word to everyone
That I’m on the Yamuna banks.
Oh, my queen,
Pour me some wine
Stolen from the glasses.
If you can not put out the fire
With your lips-
How can I ever feel happy again?
I think you should know,
That my lips are not here
To observe and heal the sore.
Oh, great Lord,
Stop the time,
Hold back the word
from this mouth
`Cause it's a sweet lie.
That's why, every time, I ask from her
a glass of wine.
Tonight I’m asking you:
Ail with me.
With ache in your soul
Say along with me:”Oh!”
In order to relive the pain
In order not to say ”Oh” ever again.
I asked the wise man,
Who construes the book of Kālidāsa,
To instruct me.
And the sage said through tears:
”I feel as bad as you do,
I know that love broke your heart:”Oh!”
I wish for you to be by my side tonight,
The doctor examines me-
”Why were you deceived by love?”
I can see on her forehead
No red spot of blood.
I think that you haven’t lost anything.
Playing with the ashes
You have created a love image
Since this day forward
We are only friends.
You are no longer my love angel,
I have selected another man.
You, who have gone with the day,
The words of a man could no longer joy you,
Nor crown you with festoons,
Turned into rosebuds in the lotus crown,
The very same morning when you left me.
I have forgotten
That this is a different time,
I have forgotten that you lied
And placed me into a love triangle,
I have forgotten those words
That you pronounced in trembling voice:
”We can be only friends.”
Oh, Mumtaz Mahal!
Tonight love is taking away one life.
The sea waves
Will rest in the big cradle,
In a dream
The wood fire
Shall lie down on the dusty bed.
We will break apart.
Parting shall hide
And the lonely flower smiling in the sun.
I think of you,
Of your golden pitcher
That you carried on your head.
Now you see the end of one love.
Come with me
For blood is in the end.
The candle is about to burn down.
Everything that you have asked for,
Has been done.
Your every word is happiness
The prettiest Roma girls
Live because of you,
Because of your poems,
Because of the sight of you.
I shall settle down
In the depth of your dream
And when you wake up from a dream
You will notice me
Flying into hell
Like a little forest butterfly.
And when they ask you:
“Where is our poet?”-
What will you answer?
He is in my pupils,
He is in my whole body,
He is in my soul.
Young Roma women and men
Will sing your songs
All over the universe
And the Sun and the Moon
Shall celebrate your birthday
Gods will place you in their pantheon
From Vayas, ?????????
To Prem Chand,
your place will be.
Princesses shall offer you
Oh, come, come to me,
For tomorrow we shall be a day older.
So please come.
Let us use the time
So we won’t cry after it tomorrow.
For all your requests
I don’t care.
As from this day on
I will be yours no more.
You will hear
My love hysteria
You will have pleasant dreams
A different person
Stands in front of you.
For a long time the flowers will flourish without us,
For a long time the spring will prosper without us!
Aprils and Mays shall be again
And we will be hidden under dust and soil!
After us garden shall breed many roses,
Darlings shall give everything to their sweethearts!
And myriad of people shall yet to be born
So they could peacefully walk on our ashes.
Without any change
You were recently given
Well, if that’s so,
I have nothing to seek here for.
I shall swim across
The deep love water.
The time will throw me
From one end to another,
From one bank to another,
From one river to another,
It is time for me to leave
And when you reach your hands for me
You will not find me there.
Oh, God, why don’t you reincarnate me?!
Why don’t you turn me into the wind
So I could cuddle her?
Why don’t you turn me into water
So I could lave her,
So I could kiss her forever and ever,
So I could whisper in her ears,
So I could see her from the window
In the heavenly light that has just begun to walk,
So I could ask her once more
What she really thinks of me?
No, no more cries,
The night is coming to an end,
April 15th will dawn,
The well of our eyes will run dry
And your heart will be calm.
Who says `tis hard to forget,
Who says you will live no more.
She can erase my name
If it’s too hard for her,
But she can't erase this poem
From her head.
In my opinion,
These gentle flowers
Will not understand
That we can't pick them together again.
I can see now
How hard parting can be.
My tears are like verses.
The first one says:”We were so close.”
The second says:”Now we are so far.”
Eyes, do not cry even when it hurts so hard.
We will not wait for anyone.
She will not come.
There is no reason for cries.
Now she is in Bharata.
Our engagement sleeps,
Our love is dying,
Only a lie remains.
As illusion of life.
Rivers of tears can not wash away
Everything there was.
Eyes, do not cry,
Even though it hurts so much!
Eyes, you are the ones to blame
For everything there was
`Cause you chose her.
You followed her trace
And disobeyed the voice of my heart
That always said:
She belongs to someone else.”
We are now strangers to each other.
Do not cry, eyes, when I’m in so much pain
`Cause she’s not worth it.
Had she known the true love
She wouldn’t have allowed the death of our love.
If she had, as I said,
Brought tears in my life,
Let her be forsaken by my heart!
Don’t you ever ail for her again!
Stop, my eyes, do not cry any more!
I want to forget her.
Oh, Mumtaz Mahal
I do not know why I have chosen you
Among all the women on the earth.
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah!
I wanted to leave her
But all is well now, the dream has gone.
I'm tired. Here are the white pages
Sleeping among my scripts.
Pain and silence
Will impress useless marks
On books that shall remain after me
Marks that will sink into nothingness.
Eyes are opened and then closed-
I do not know if I will be able
To knock on the gates of heaven
During that moment of light.
Eyes are opened and then closed-
I do not know if I will be able
To transcend that that presents a world to an ant
But only uncertain step to a poet.
Oh, Lord, why didn't this night last
As Ramachandra did
For fourteen years.
I appeased my thirst on Yamuna
And then realized her truth.
No one ever told her thoughts like this
Nor stringed pearl necklace out of secrets.
Heavens reveled their mysteries to me
I will not hide them from the world.
My dear, fill the ewer that today
Erases tomorrows threats or of the past.
Know that tomorrow I will be old for centuries
So yesterday and tomorrow no longer exist.
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